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Have you ever wondered? Is that how you arrived at your list of goals in the first place? What would life be like if you achieved all your goals? What would change? What are you hoping for? What are your goals?

Lots of questions, I know. But that’s what Monday Musings are about. It’s time to look within to find out what motivates you. Time to see the complete picture as far as you can.

You can answer in the comments or on your site. I’ll be back later on with my thoughts.

I’m back

I found it interesting that the comments left inferred that meeting all of life’s goals would bring an end to life. I guess it would matter which goals were achieved. Then later on in the day I was reading Scott Adam’s blog (The Dilbert Guy), and he said:

I remember when Dilbert hit it big and it became clear that I would never again have to worry about money. It was a wonderful feeling, but it didn’t last. I went from happy to hollow with no warning. The first moment that I could afford any car I wanted, I lost interest in having a nice car. I simply couldn’t see the point, if there ever was one. Success is surprisingly disorienting.

He goes on to say that once he realized that all of his goals were met, he turned outward. In his words, ” [he] found ways to use [his] success to make the world a little bit better.”

Why the questions?

This entire line of questioning started because I was tagged by Alex Shalman to list 5-10 of my gotta have it goals. I created my list of goals by envisioning the life that I want. From that point, I listed the items that would make up that life and the milestones that would mark my way along the journey. However, I realize that a few of my goals are more like lifetime achievements than milestones and I began to wonder what would happen once those were met. I figure a whole vision will open up. So without further ado, here’s my gotta have it list:

1. Fully realize and know my Oneness with God a la Jesus or Buddha. Yup, it’s at the top of the list. This is the one that got me wondering what next. Once that happens, what’s a gal to do?
2. Start a school that teaches holistically and can be duplicated. The school would incorporate experiential lessons, trips to various countries, explorations of different cultures, and heavy parental involvement with a possible adjunct curriculum for parents. One thing I’d like to do is teach people how to layer ideas over problems to solve them, rather than thinking that solutions are unique to a particular problem. After these two the rest seem unimportant, but they will help me achieve them.
3. Be wealthy. I have a number in mind that I won’t disclose, but it’s an income number not a net worth number. I want to be a philanthropist on the scale of Bill Gates, or Oprah Winfrey.
4. Experience radiant health. Health is the area of my life where I struggle the most. Specifically, my goal is to weigh below 137 lbs, and maintain healthy cholesterol levels, heart rate, and blood sugar.
5. Run the Alaska marathon with Team in Training. Team in Training is a phenomenal organization that combines volunteerism, leadership development, and athletic training. I think it’ll be cool to run in Alaska with that group of people.
6. Speak to an audience of 250 or more people in each of 100 countries. Part of my purpose is to heighten spiritual awareness, help people tap into their Divinity, and see the Divinity in others.
7. Have a loving, sexy, soulful, spiritual, symbiotic, fun, flourishing, successful marriage. I want a marriage thats a partnership filled with passion.
8. Be a present, integral, loving member of my family.

When I achieve these goals, I feel like a whole other world will open. It’s like driving down the street and knowing there’s a corner coming up. You don’t know what’s around the corner until you get to that point.

Oh, and I tag:

Jon - Art of Money
Kimber and Erin - No Limit Ladies
Terry - Ramblings from a Glass Half Full
Kammie - Passion Meets Purpose
Tony - Success from the Nest
Scott - The Approachability Guy
Wade - The Middle Way
Alexander - The Chief Happiness Officer
Mama Duck - L’il Duck Duck
Rick - Shards of Consciousness
Lyman - Creating A Better Life
Gleb - Personal Development Ideas

And all of my readers (shy friends) who want to tell the world about their goals!

In Spirit,
Nneka

For 6 months, I’ve been working on a self-designed Life Transformation Program. In an effort to shift my life from the difficult, dark place I was in, to an on-purpose, light existence, I instituted 3 things that I would do daily: meditate, exercise, and write.

So far, I breathe easier (I have asthma), I’ve lost weight, increased my net worth, improved my marriage, made several friends, and grown to love where I live. In short, I’ve made a 180 turn. In addition to these benefits, I’ve learned a lot about how to achieve my goals and live life on my terms. Many of these have been trumpeted by personal development gurus, but there’s nothing like learning from doing.

Lesson 1: Action Is Key

Try as I might to visualize my way to good health, it just was not working Turns out that I actually needed to get out and walk. Same thing with my goal of becoming a writer. One blog post may not make me a writer. However, no words on a page or on a computer screen, definitely make me a non-writer.

Action is essential if you want to achieve your goals.

Lesson 2: Small Consistent Steps

Consistent action is even better. I’ve said this before, but it seems like a novel idea to me, so I’ll repeat it.

I used to think that I had to make huge leaps to accomplish my goals, that I could do it once and be done. Certainly, some things in life are like that, but it turns out that being healthy, or living on purpose is not a one time event. It takes consistent deposits. In order to sustain my efforts, I needed to make them tiny.

In the beginning, this felt laborious and pointless. After all, I saw no evidence of weight loss after 1 week of walking. However, today, after 6 months, I can really see the difference in the shape of my body, and my breathing, not to mention the scale.

Small steps may seem like a chore, but they add up and they are doable.

Lesson 3: First Things First

Meditating, exercising, and writing set up my day. To be honest, I started off meditating and exercising first thing in the morning and it gradually shifted to when it could be done. It’s much better to get the important things done first. It sets the tone for your day. It makes you feel accomplished out the gate. It ensures that it is done.

I thought that I would have to give up some things in order to do this Life Transformation Program, but it turned out to be just the opposite. Once I set a priority on those all important activities and wrapped my days around them, everything else had a place. I could talk on the phone, surf the internet, work my 9-5, volunteer at church, be a board member, do Toastmasters, read books, and be present with my husband. All the while with no worries or guilt because I got the important stuff done.

Lesson 4: Do It Anyway

In January when the temperature was in the teens at 5 o’clock, I just did not want to leave my warm, cozy bed and brave the wind so that I could walk for 40 minutes. So I used the Walk Away The Pounds DVD, and got my 40 minute walk in ANYWAY. (It actually worked out better because my body got some different movements.)

When my mind keeps chattering on and meditation becomes a philosophical discussion or a planning session, I continue to bring myself back to my breath, and sit still ANYWAY.

When I can’t think of anything cohesive to publish on Balanced Life Center and my brain is rattling away, I open up a Notepad and I write ANYWAY. (I may not publish it, but I do write.)

My edict for this year is: Exercise, meditation, and writing done, are better than exercise, meditation, and writing not done.

Lesson 5: Trust Yourself

That said, I’ve failed the 30-day trial every month because of extenuating circumstances. Days when I was too sick to leave my bed, or the week spent in Miami with my family. On those occasions, I yielded to the voice that said that I needed to rest, or that I needed to be present with my niece and nephew.

The caveat is that I could only do that because I built in those habits. I have a deal with myself that I write, exercise, and meditate, no excuses. I learned to tell the difference between an excuse and a genuine reason. In short, I learned how to call myself on bullsh!t, and how to give myself some leeway without a side of guilt. I’m not sure how I managed this, but it’s a great side-effect.

Lesson 6: Attract, Don’t Chase

A minister once said to a groom before the wedding, “Never chase a bus.”

I got this lesson recently. I learned that if I do what I have to do, everything else will fall into place. By writing everyday, I get into the habit of generating content, fine-tuning my voice, and establishing a rhythm. In late January and February, I lost sight of that and I began chasing links and stories. Writing became difficult. Once I realized what I was doing, I returned my focus to my habits. Everything then fell into place. I stopped chasing, and all manner of opportunity gravitated toward me. Life was easy again.

Lesson 7: Be Present

A great side-effect of meditation is becoming aware in every moment. One day I was in meditation and I just marvelled at the luxury of the situation. I could sit in a comfortable chair, in a comfortable room, quiet all around me, and take the time to just be. No appointments, nowhere to go. I had the luxury of being completely present. Then it dawned on me: I chose to do this, I can choose at any time.

I began the practice of being present all the time. Being completely engaged when reading a post, or walking in the morning, or troubleshooting a problem for a customer, or in conversation with a friend, and even in the midst of a heated discussion. I could watch myself acting, see everything around me, and choose consciously in the moment. I’ve not mastered this yet, but I would say that my level of awareness is about 5 times what it was.

As a result, I feel truly alive, and no matter what activity I’m engaged in, I’m having fun. I bring myself completely to everything.

Conclusion

As if the direct rewards - weight loss, increased income, and peace of mind - weren’t enough, I also receive a great sideline of experience and self awareness through the Life Transformation Program. I figure, if I can achieve the small goal of exercise today, I will be able to achieve my big audacious goal of starting a school.

In Spirit,
Nneka