Recently, I reported that I gained 28 hours a week by giving up television. It’s really easy to fill that time up with other meaningless activity. What really helped my time management was a complete paradigm shift. First I had to free up the time, but then I resisted busy-ness, prioritized my desires, cleared my mind, and integrated my life. Combined, I was able to create a full, rich life.

Give Up Busy-ness

Most time management systems emphasize creating, categorizing, and prioritizing lists and getting them done. One of the disadvantages of these systems is that the time spent getting something done is passed as drudgery and you get the high of the accomplishment. The high is fleeting, but you’ve passed minutes or hours. You are left with a sense of emptiness even though you’ve accomplished everything on your list.

Lists generate a lot of activity that is largely unfulfilling. Like a hummingbird, you flit from task to task and at the end of the day you have a tiny bit of nectar to show for your hard work. This can be very frustrating.

Let go of busy-ness. Spend your time engaging in meaningful activities that nourish you life. When I told my colleague this, he responded that he still had to do the laundry. This, of course, is true. We still have to do the dishes and the laundry and the bathrooms, so read on.

Do First Things First

Last year, in addition to my 40-hour week job, I served as Board President, completed speeches toward my Toastmaster’s Competent Communicator award, and published over 100 articles on this site. All while going through a divorce.

None of those activities were on my daily hit list though. Sure, doing my full time job was necessary to bring in income to fund the rest of my activities, but it was not a must-do. My top priority was living an inspired life. I realized that, meditation, walking, and writing, were the 3 things that enriched my life and fueled me to complete all the other tasks. That’s where I put my focus. They were at the top of the heap. Once they got done, I felt my day was complete even thought I still had 8 hours at my day job.

Completing the most important tasks first, sends a message to your being that you are successful. It reinforces that you can accomplish what you set your mind too. It gives you the confidence needed to reach your goals.

Identify what is important to you and do the activities that support this idea first.

Build Mental Space

Mental space gives you the capacity to hold the complete picture in your mind, yet execute effectively in the moment. At any point you are fully engaged in the task at hand, and in your mind there is a clear mental picture of all that is necessary for you to succeed. It gives you the ability to move with ease and grace throughout your activities without being overwhelmed.

What brings this ease?

A healthy spiritual practice, preferably silent meditation. Your spiritual practice will center you. You will gain clarity so that you function as a laser without having blind spots.

Interconnect Your Life

In the West, we tend to live in stylos. We work for 8-5 Monday to Friday. We spend time with our children for x number of hours a week. We engage in hobbies with friends or alone. However, we don’t see those friends in any other aspect of our lives. We might attend worship services, but not engage in the community outside of that hour on Sunday.

When you weave your life together, the party that you have to go to on Saturday for Christopher’s friend becomes social time for you as well. Rather than sit on the sidelines watching the kids play, spend some time engaging in conversation with the hosts. Get together with the moms alone so that you can enjoy the friendship these women offer.

An integral life that is woven like a tapestry is stronger and more fulfilling. You leverage your time because you are completing multiple tasks. In addition, the whole activity is more enriching than the sum of the individual tasks.

In Spirit,
Nneka

For 6 months, I’ve been working on a self-designed Life Transformation Program. In an effort to shift my life from the difficult, dark place I was in, to an on-purpose, light existence, I instituted 3 things that I would do daily: meditate, exercise, and write.

So far, I breathe easier (I have asthma), I’ve lost weight, increased my net worth, improved my marriage, made several friends, and grown to love where I live. In short, I’ve made a 180 turn. In addition to these benefits, I’ve learned a lot about how to achieve my goals and live life on my terms. Many of these have been trumpeted by personal development gurus, but there’s nothing like learning from doing.

Lesson 1: Action Is Key

Try as I might to visualize my way to good health, it just was not working Turns out that I actually needed to get out and walk. Same thing with my goal of becoming a writer. One blog post may not make me a writer. However, no words on a page or on a computer screen, definitely make me a non-writer.

Action is essential if you want to achieve your goals.

Lesson 2: Small Consistent Steps

Consistent action is even better. I’ve said this before, but it seems like a novel idea to me, so I’ll repeat it.

I used to think that I had to make huge leaps to accomplish my goals, that I could do it once and be done. Certainly, some things in life are like that, but it turns out that being healthy, or living on purpose is not a one time event. It takes consistent deposits. In order to sustain my efforts, I needed to make them tiny.

In the beginning, this felt laborious and pointless. After all, I saw no evidence of weight loss after 1 week of walking. However, today, after 6 months, I can really see the difference in the shape of my body, and my breathing, not to mention the scale.

Small steps may seem like a chore, but they add up and they are doable.

Lesson 3: First Things First

Meditating, exercising, and writing set up my day. To be honest, I started off meditating and exercising first thing in the morning and it gradually shifted to when it could be done. It’s much better to get the important things done first. It sets the tone for your day. It makes you feel accomplished out the gate. It ensures that it is done.

I thought that I would have to give up some things in order to do this Life Transformation Program, but it turned out to be just the opposite. Once I set a priority on those all important activities and wrapped my days around them, everything else had a place. I could talk on the phone, surf the internet, work my 9-5, volunteer at church, be a board member, do Toastmasters, read books, and be present with my husband. All the while with no worries or guilt because I got the important stuff done.

Lesson 4: Do It Anyway

In January when the temperature was in the teens at 5 o’clock, I just did not want to leave my warm, cozy bed and brave the wind so that I could walk for 40 minutes. So I used the Walk Away The Pounds DVD, and got my 40 minute walk in ANYWAY. (It actually worked out better because my body got some different movements.)

When my mind keeps chattering on and meditation becomes a philosophical discussion or a planning session, I continue to bring myself back to my breath, and sit still ANYWAY.

When I can’t think of anything cohesive to publish on Balanced Life Center and my brain is rattling away, I open up a Notepad and I write ANYWAY. (I may not publish it, but I do write.)

My edict for this year is: Exercise, meditation, and writing done, are better than exercise, meditation, and writing not done.

Lesson 5: Trust Yourself

That said, I’ve failed the 30-day trial every month because of extenuating circumstances. Days when I was too sick to leave my bed, or the week spent in Miami with my family. On those occasions, I yielded to the voice that said that I needed to rest, or that I needed to be present with my niece and nephew.

The caveat is that I could only do that because I built in those habits. I have a deal with myself that I write, exercise, and meditate, no excuses. I learned to tell the difference between an excuse and a genuine reason. In short, I learned how to call myself on bullsh!t, and how to give myself some leeway without a side of guilt. I’m not sure how I managed this, but it’s a great side-effect.

Lesson 6: Attract, Don’t Chase

A minister once said to a groom before the wedding, “Never chase a bus.”

I got this lesson recently. I learned that if I do what I have to do, everything else will fall into place. By writing everyday, I get into the habit of generating content, fine-tuning my voice, and establishing a rhythm. In late January and February, I lost sight of that and I began chasing links and stories. Writing became difficult. Once I realized what I was doing, I returned my focus to my habits. Everything then fell into place. I stopped chasing, and all manner of opportunity gravitated toward me. Life was easy again.

Lesson 7: Be Present

A great side-effect of meditation is becoming aware in every moment. One day I was in meditation and I just marvelled at the luxury of the situation. I could sit in a comfortable chair, in a comfortable room, quiet all around me, and take the time to just be. No appointments, nowhere to go. I had the luxury of being completely present. Then it dawned on me: I chose to do this, I can choose at any time.

I began the practice of being present all the time. Being completely engaged when reading a post, or walking in the morning, or troubleshooting a problem for a customer, or in conversation with a friend, and even in the midst of a heated discussion. I could watch myself acting, see everything around me, and choose consciously in the moment. I’ve not mastered this yet, but I would say that my level of awareness is about 5 times what it was.

As a result, I feel truly alive, and no matter what activity I’m engaged in, I’m having fun. I bring myself completely to everything.

Conclusion

As if the direct rewards - weight loss, increased income, and peace of mind - weren’t enough, I also receive a great sideline of experience and self awareness through the Life Transformation Program. I figure, if I can achieve the small goal of exercise today, I will be able to achieve my big audacious goal of starting a school.

In Spirit,
Nneka