This morning I got a visit from my dead grandparents in meditation. Within moments of slipping into meditation I “saw” them. Saw is not really an accurate word, neither is heard or felt. It was more an impression.

The whole concept of relating to the deceased and spirit guides is foreign to me. I’ve been a by-the-book God person from my inception. Not a God in the sky idea, but a notion of God as the Essence of Life. I even bypassed Jesus. My thinking was that if God is everywhere present and accessible, why do I have to go through all these people (saints, Mary, Jesus, Buddha), or entities (spirit guides, deceased, angels) to access It. I discounted the whole ball of wax. So this morning when I was greeted by the impressions of my grandparents I was a bit, how can I say, caught off guard.

They came to assure me that I am loved and to explain some things about my family dynamics. They were very effective. However, the visit prompted a core question: What happens when we die?

I think when we die we recede into Source, otherwise known as God/Consciousness/Spirit. When we are born, we re-emerge. It appears that we forget our experience as Source. I think we remember until we are convinced that it’s not so. Here are a few other ideas that I kicked around when the question of why we forget came up.

Why Do We Forget?

I think forget where we came from for the same reason we are admonished to live in the moment. In the moment we have access to all the Knowledge, Substance, Love, Joy, and Good things. It is All available right now.

Our memory serves more to cloud our perception of what we can and cannot be, do or have. Just memories from childhood limit what we think we can do. Our so-called knowledge about science keeps us from defying it or even thinking that it is defiable (until someone does it). Imagine if we had lifetimes of such information.

Better to be completely present and choose from the Infinite Realm of Possibilities that is readily available.

Would our Memories of Past Lives Hinder our Experience of This One?

I don’t think it’s the memories per se that would limit our conscious development. Rather, it’s our clinging to something that is not in the present. It was an experience. It happened. It’s not happening now, and our point of power is now.

Let’s take an example of a good thing in the present. Say you have a great 11 year old birthday. Your family was happy. Your parents were there. You had a lot of friends. Soon after, your parents got divorced, you had to move, and you lost your circle of friends. You became very isolated in the new city. Yet you cling to that experience. In one sense, it helps you to feel better. In another sense, it is preventing you from choosing in this moment to create new friendships.

Now imagine if you were a king in one lifetime or a pleb in another. A lot of us have the tendency to cling to memories as if they were happening now. That’s what inhibits us from living the life that we want, or in other words, from consciously creating the life that we want.

Doesn’t It Make More Sense To Remember?

At any given moment, we have access to All Knowledge and experience. We have access to our other incarnations as well as the incarnations and current lives of everyone else. In each moment, we have that access. So it wasn’t really “nuked”. We just aren’t aware of it.

What Happens When We Die?

Consider that God/Consciousness/Spirit is the ocean and you are a wave emerging from the ocean. So is grandmother, Lena. When she dies, she recedes into the ocean. Can you pin point a wave in the ocean when it has receded?

This is what I’ve experienced. As I became disciplined and consistent in my meditation, I felt like my edges were sandpapered. It scared the bejesus out of me because my edges were disintegrating. This prepared me for the next phase in which I felt like I had no ends. I just faded into the “ocean”. Today, I can overlap with other people’s consciousness.

We become attached to our individuality to the extent that we believe that it is the singular entity incarnating again and again. But it’s not you with edges in a container that comes in and out unless you choose too. I wouldn’t be surprised if people have experienced past life regressions where they were 2 people living at the same time.

My theory is - and a little bit of experience - that we emerge out of the ocean as a composite. Once we recede into it, we are no more. Sometimes people have a tough time returning because they want to stick together. I felt this as my edges were being sandpapered. I had great resistance to disintegrating.

We can disintegrate and reintegrate at any moment.

In Spirit,
Nneka

Over a year ago, I stopped watching television. In fact, I don’t even own a television. It’s saved me money, freed up my time, and given me back my opinions. When I tell people I don’t have a television, they always respond with shock and awe, followed by either admiration or scowl.

I usually get the following questions:

• What do you do with all that time?
• How do you know what’s going on?
• Don’t you get bored?

Here are some answers:

1. Save $2000 a year from cable and electricity.
2. Engage in your life instead of watching people pretend to live theirs.
3. The average American spends 28 hours week watching television. Reclaim your time.
4. Make love passionately for hours.
5. Visit another city, state, or country on your savings.
6. Go to the spa every month.
7. Go salsa dancing.
8. Take bellydancing, yoga, pottery, name-of-the-class-you’ve-always-wanted-to-take-but-didn’t-have-the-money-to classes.
9. Learn to invest.
10. Pay off your debt.
11. Read a book a week.
12. Enroll in courses for a degree.
13. Get a part time job.
14. Cook.
15. Start a business.
16. Become a Toastmasters’ Competent Communicator.
17. Canvass for your favorite presidential candidate.
18. Develop your spiritual practice.
19. Take bellydancing, yoga, pottery, name-of-the-class-you’ve-always-wanted-to-take-but-didn’t-have-the-time-to classes.
20. Exercise.
21. Acquire leadership skills by serving as an officer in your favorite organization.
22. Screen your news.
23. Get information from consciously chosen sources.
24. Create your own standards for living.
25. Visit museums.
26. Create your own beauty standards.
27. Experience joy.
28. Meet your neighbors.
29. Talk to your neighbors.
30. Make friends.
31. Reconnect with friends.
32. Explore the city you live in.
33. Attend concerts, dance recitals, and plays.
34. Visit local art shows.
35. Discover music.
36. Plant a garden.
37. Get a pet.
38. Go for aimless walks.
39. Watch birds, lizards, and other creatures.
40. Babysit for a friend.
41. Search for the Truth.
42. Date yourself.
43. Go to bed and wake up early.

Guess which 5 I haven’t done

In Spirit,
Nneka