Season of Gratitude
This post is a part of the Season of Gratitude Series. You can participate by writing a gratitude post and telling me about it. For more details, click here.

For the past 2 weeks I have been off my center. Five months ago my husband and I separated. In the past 2 weeks we reconnected and began to talk about our relationship. We are both on virgin territory. Me more than he, as I’m a very head centered person. When we saw each other again, I was flooded with emotions that were sitting under the crust of anger that had enveloped my heart. They surged to the surface.

I’m not one to rely on my heart very much, and, as I’ve mentioned before, spent years suppressing emotions. I used to eat them. Since I gave up that elixir, I’ve marched headlong into a fury of emotions. For the longest time that was anger, as it related to my husband. Then, as I forgave him and myself, I moved into sadness. Finally, the anger lifted and I experienced joy. I was not prepared for the onslaught of love.

Not surprisingly, I got a clear message today to go with my heart. To explore all of the feelings that are there. To courageously peel back the top that I quickly put on the box.

As a result, I am off my center, in new territory.

Perhaps, the truth is that I am very much in my element, but I am overwhelmed by the feeling of palpable longing, missing, desire. What to make of this new place?

Nonetheless, today I am grateful for my emotions, for actually feeling them, for a level of clarity and willingness that says I won’t cover them up. What are you grateful for?

In Spirit,
Nneka