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I’ve never been afraid of speaking in public. In fact, I love doing it. But last Sunday, an interesting thought popped into my consciousness.

On queue, I confidently walked up the 3 steps to the podium as ‘Surely the Presence’ was winding down. I began as usual with “Surely the Presence of the Lord is in this place. Let us pray.” However, instead of hearing my amplified voice echo into the audience, I sounded flat. I continued to speak into the mic, but raised my voice so that the audience could hear. Good thing the acoustics in the sanctuary are phenomenal.

As I calmly finished the prayer, I distinctly heard the voice. You know the voice. The one that convinces people that public speaking is a scary, dangerous endeavor. “Not so hot now huh,” it said. Well, I had to smile.

I asked the audience if they could hear me. They said yes. And I assuredly went on with the announcements.

Ordinarily, that thought would mean nothing, except that in 2 hours I had to do the same thing in front of 400 people, the general public no less, in a park, under the trees, with no sound check!

Fear began to creep in. It was seeping through the crevices of my sanctuary. The space I go to within to meet Spirit. The place from which brilliant light shines. Fear crept in, dark and murky, like crude oil, but the light of Spirit continued to shine.

This time something curious was happening. First of all, I was witnessing the process. I was aware of the light and I was aware of the shadow. I could see it and feel it. I was present to the moment. Rather than letting that fear seep past my conscious awareness and take over my subconscious, I amplified the light. I gave it permission to shine brighter. I gave mySelf permission to be bolder, more flambouyant, more assured. I mean, the light was pouring out until there was no fear, and no me. It was a moment I’ve been yearning for. Literally, a moment of in-light-enment.

Spirit found its place in me that day. Actually, I allowed myself to be Spirit that day. I pushed the boundary. I stepped out of the way completely and I experienced radiance, joy, peace, love, and understanding beyond my imagination.

There truly is power in the present and in the Presence.

In Spirit,
Nneka